08
Nov
09

The Physics of Homeopathy

Ever wonder how homeopathy is supposed to work? Well, Charlene Werner wants to explain to people how it works!

Here’s the video, but I’m going to be kind enough to transcribe it, so you have the option of just reading it rather than giving it another page hit.

Well, thank you so much, I’m going to explain to you exactly, actually how it works. Now, has everybody had chemistry, like, uhm, in school, way back when? But you do know what H2O is, ok. And have all of you heard of Einstein? Ok, you know that light is energy, right? And he gave us the theory that energy equals mass time the speed of light; e=mc2. Ok, now if you take that formula, and we think there’s a lot of mass, right? Ok, if you collapsed all the mass down into the universe so there is no space between the mass, do you know how much mass there is in the entire universe? You think you’re a lot of mass, right? I’m a lot of mass, this building is…[laughing] Well, the whole universal mass can be consolidated down into the size of a bowling ball, that’s all there is in the whole world, in the universe. So how much mass are you? That’s right, an infinitesimal amount. So if you take that formula, e=mc2, you can almost cross out mass. So the formula ends up being energy equals the speed of light. Ok, and that’s why the vision system is so important. Because we have lots of photoreceptors that receive light. But when Hahnemann died, he, uhm, the scientists didn’t fall in his camp. Ok, and uhm, the pieces of the puzzle didn’t fit well together. So god in his infinite wisdom send him another Einstein called Steven Hawkings [sic: see Stephen Hawking]. Ok, Steven Hawkings [sic] gave us the string theory, and what he discovered is that there are other energetic particles in the universe and they are shaped like little “u-ies” and what they do is they work by vibration so our body is so wonderfully designed; we have light receivers, and we have ears, string, vibratory, they pick up vibration, so if you add it to that theory, Einstein’s theory of relativity, we have e=mc2, that mass is crossed out almost, and strings, vibration. But that still doesn’t tell us the whole picture. Because what is a cell? Right? So a cell has cell walls, cell membranes, cytoplasm. Is that mass? Not very much, really, so what are they, what is that? You can break down the cells into tiny pieces of energy, called electrons, protons, neutrons. So the whole body has an infinitesimal amount of mass, but what is the remainder? Energy. So I am energy, you are energy. Now if you go to study physics, energy cannot be created, we do not know how to create energy, but we don’t know how to destroy it either. That is not humanly possible. So what we do is we take energy and we transform it from one state to another. That’s all we do, so if that’s all we do, guess what the definition of disease is. It’s not mass, we have transformed our energy state into something different. That’s what the definition of disease is. Ok, so we should be able to retransform our energy into a previous better state, right? So what we do is we use light, we use sound, we can use homeopathy. Ok, so what is homeopathy, if nothing is really mass, or an infinitesimal amount of it, and everything is energy, that means everything has a vibration to it. Ok, so what if I could encase some sort of energy for later use? Ok, so, if I wanted to make a bomb, and I took all these chemicals and encased it a..a bomb, and tonight, my neighbor lets his dog poop in my yard, literally, and I’m mad at that dog, and my neighbor, so I’m gonna take this bomb, and I’m going to get back at him. So what if I threw that bomb at his house, would he be happy with me? Because what happens now when that energy is released? It destroys something, or changes it. It makes the building now not in structure form, it changes its energetic state. Well that’s what we can do with homeopathy. We take substances and what we do is we, we pulverize them, and we put them in solution, and we succuss it just like the bomb, we threw the bomb, to release its energy into this liquid, and then we take these little white pellets, we sprinkle them with that solution, and guess what we have just made? An energetic substance to be used when we choose to use it. Ok, so how homeopathy works is, whatever your disease process is, it’s an energetic change, and if I can find the remedy which matches your state, and give it to you when we so choose, what can we do with your energy system? Transform it to a previous better state. And that’s how it works.

She then goes on to even more nonsensical stories….

Now, I’m sure you, like myself, are completely dumbfounded by how much nonsense is in this talk. I might subject this to a thorough fisking… Oh, what the hell, let’s go

Well, thank you so much, I’m going to explain to you exactly, actually how it works. Now, has everybody had chemistry, like, uhm, in school, way back when?

Why yes, Charlene, I, in fact, have had quite a few classes covering chemistry, probably more than you, actually. At the very least, I learned more about chemistry.

But you do know what H2O is, ok.

Call it water… Please, I’m begging you, don’t try to sound like you know this…

And have all of you heard of Einstein?

Einstein has something to do with homeopathy? Do tell…

Ok, you know that light is energy, right?

Light is a type of energy, it is, specifically, electromagnetic energy. So, it’s an energetic particle, known as a photon.

And he gave us the theory that energy equals mass time the speed of light; e=mc2.

Yes, and?

Ok, now if you take that formula, and we think there’s a lot of mass, right? Ok, if you collapsed all the mass down into the universe so there is no space between the mass, do you know how much mass there is in the entire universe?

Wait, since when is mass the same as volume? Mass is not the same as “matter.” The MASS of the entire universe is about 1053 kg. Mass has no maximum density since mass is just a measure of how much matter is in a specific area. It can be thought that matter is mostly empty space, but the reality is that no area of space is actually empty. It is constantly boiling with virtual particles condensing and collapsing in and out of existence. So if you want to ignore the virtual particles, then yes, matter is mostly empty space. Good job at ignoring most of our universe, though.

You think you’re a lot of mass, right?

Don’t you just love subjective ideas?

I’m a lot of mass, this building is…[laughing] Well, the whole universal mass can be consolidated down into the size of a bowling ball,

This is patent nonsense. Density of matter can approach infinity as it does in gravitational singularities such as black holes. You could put any amount of matter in any volume because of this neat little quirk.

that’s all there is in the whole world, in the universe. So how much mass are you? That’s right, an infinitesimal amount.

No, any person is a given amount of mass. You cannot ignore this mass. It exists. As much as cosmologists would like to ignore dark matter and dark energy, they can’t do it. It would be convenient, but just because it is convenient to ignore reality doesn’t mean you can do it and still expect to make sense of the world.

So if you take that formula, e=mc2, you can almost cross out mass.

Have you read anything about mass-energy equivalence? That was to calculate the energy within a particle. A particle has MASS. Photons, while being technically massless, can remove mass from a system because they carry it off in the form of energy. Mass can be converted to energy and energy can be converted to mass. That is what Einstein described.

So the formula ends up being energy equals the speed of light.

Because you ignore a number? Energy is measured in kg-m2/s2. You wish to make it m2/s2. What happened to that conveniently ignored unit? Are you going to just magically turn it into a 1?

Ok, and that’s why the vision system is so important.

What? Because energy is light? What about the huge range we can’t see? You know, we can only see a very small fraction of the electromagnetic spectrum.

Because we have lots of photoreceptors that receive light.

Infrared? Ultraviolet? Gamma? X-ray? Microwave? Radio? What about all of these frequency ranges we can’t detect?

But when Hahnemann died, he, uhm, the scientists didn’t fall in his camp.

Because he was full of shit, and they could smell it.

Ok, and uhm, the pieces of the puzzle didn’t fit well together.

Because pieces were being ignored?

So god in his infinite wisdom send him another Einstein called Steven Hawkings [sic: see Stephen Hawking].

I don’t think Dr. Hawking would be happy about you using him to promote your vile crap.

Ok, Steven Hawkings [sic] gave us the string theory,

Hawking isn’t responsible for String Theory; that would be a myriad of scientists working in the field of physics known as “string theorists.” Hawking is not one of them.

and what he discovered is that there are other energetic particles in the universe and they are shaped like little “u-ies”

What a wonderful bit of crap. Strings are supposedly one dimensional objects which interacts with one another to compose the elementary particles which comprise matter. They have no shape, because they are ONE dimensional.

and what they do is they work by vibration so our body is so wonderfully designed;

Our bodies are designed? The varying vibrations of strings are supposedly responsible for different types of particles and interactions.

we have light receivers, and we have ears, string, vibratory, they pick up vibration,

Vibrations on the subatomic level are not the same as the frequency of photons or compression waves of sound.

so if you add it to that theory, Einstein’s theory of relativity, we have e=mc2, that mass is crossed out almost,

But it can’t be! You can’t just ignore a term.

and strings, vibration. But that still doesn’t tell us the whole picture.

Yea, it’s a bunch of bullshit, it doesn’t tell us anything.

Because what is a cell? Right? So a cell has cell walls, cell membranes, cytoplasm.

Cool, animal cells have cell walls!

Is that mass? Not very much, really, so what are they, what is that?

Uhm…there you go trying to ignore mass again. Why?

You can break down the cells into tiny pieces of energy, called electrons, protons, neutrons.

Since when do electrons, protons, and neutrons not have mass?

So the whole body has an infinitesimal amount of mass, but what is the remainder?

Uhm…the remainder of what? If you remainder of the mass you ignored? The remainder of the volume? Since when does energy require volume?

Energy. So I am energy, you are energy.

Well, yea, because matter is energy, but you are still matter.

Now if you go to study physics, energy cannot be created, we do not know how to create energy, but we don’t know how to destroy it either.

So what?

That is not humanly possible. So what we do is we take energy and we transform it from one state to another.

And?

That’s all we do, so if that’s all we do, guess what the definition of disease is.

Not really; a disease is a physiological condition with biochemical causes.

It’s not mass, we have transformed our energy state into something different.

Sure, so E. coli and Salmonella don’t cause diseases. HIV doesn’t cause a disease. They can’t cause disease because they are composed of matter.

That’s what the definition of disease is.

Because you ignore mass, arbitrarily, ignore biological causation for disease, arbitrarily, and ignore the known causative agents of diseases.

Ok, so we should be able to retransform our energy into a previous better state, right?

This is such patent nonsense. Transforming the energy in one’s body into a different state? WTF are you talking about?

So what we do is we use light, we use sound, we can use homeopathy.

To do what?

Ok, so what is homeopathy, if nothing is really mass,

But it DOES have mass, you’ve chosen to arbitrarily ignore it.

or an infinitesimal amount of it, and everything is energy, that means everything has a vibration to it.

Wow, you completely miss the point, don’t you? The “vibrations” are descriptions of the interactions.

Ok, so what if I could encase some sort of energy for later use?

Sure, you can, chemical bonds, electrons, gravitational or other kinetic potential energy (springs, pistons, etc.)

Ok, so, if I wanted to make a bomb, and I took all these chemicals and encased it a..a bomb, and tonight, my neighbor lets his dog poop in my yard, literally, and I’m mad at that dog, and my neighbor, so I’m gonna take this bomb, and I’m going to get back at him. So what if I threw that bomb at his house, would he be happy with me? Because what happens now when that energy is released? It destroys something, or changes it.

Wait, so, you’d bomb your neighbor because his dog decided your yard looked like a nice place to take a shit? Damn, aren’t you a nice person.

It makes the building now not in structure form, it changes its energetic state.

Uhh, yea, it breaks things because chemical energy was transferred to kinetic energy. What type of energy is this magical energy within organisms and molecules that you are harnessing in these mixtures? It’s not chemical energy, nor is it kinetic, what is it?

Well that’s what we can do with homeopathy.

How, what kind of energy are you taking from this substance?

We take substances and what we do is we, we pulverize them, and we put them in solution, and we succuss it just like the bomb,

What?

we threw the bomb, to release its energy into this liquid,

What kind of energy is it losing? What kind of energy is the liquid gaining?

and then we take these little white pellets, we sprinkle them with that solution, and guess what we have just made?

Ooo, ooo! I know, I know! A placebo!

An energetic substance to be used when we choose to use it.

What kind of energy?

Ok, so how homeopathy works is, whatever your disease process is, it’s an energetic change,

Energetic change? What about the matter? The biochemical processes which change?

and if I can find the remedy which matches your state, and give it to you when we so choose, what can we do with your energy system? Transform it to a previous better state. And that’s how it works.

Yep, and it’s not just that dog that’s full of shit.


8 Responses to “The Physics of Homeopathy”


  1. November 8, 2009 at 10:56 pm

    Isn’t that a lot like the argument in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy proving that there is no life in the Universe?

  2. 2 jaredcormier
    November 8, 2009 at 11:18 pm

    It is, in fact. I’m not sure if that’s where the got that line of argument…

    So long, and thanks for all the fish.

  3. 3 Pliny-the-in-Between
    November 9, 2009 at 12:18 pm

    Imagine how I feel knowing that this stuff is going to be paid for in any National healthcare ‘reform’.

  4. 4 jaredcormier
    November 9, 2009 at 3:20 pm

    it makes me want to cry…

  5. November 9, 2009 at 4:59 pm

    You ask the wrong question when asking what type of “magical energy” she is proposing to be at work here. It is clear that she is trying to suggest that “energy = magic!!1!!”. It’s just that homeopaths will never say the M-word, for fear of accurately advertising their product. The idea that disease is just a bad energy state and you need to find a magic/energy reset button also tickles me. But, interestingly, we have found something that I would never have thought to see: a mass denialist. Global warming and evolution, sure, I can see how your religious and political affiliations can force to blind yourself to evidence and claim that such things aren’t settled science. But questioning the existence of mass? That’s full fledged crankery.

  6. 6 jaredcormier
    November 9, 2009 at 6:29 pm

    Ok, so denialism extends to:
    The Shoah
    Climate Change
    HIV/AIDS
    Evolution
    Other types of corporate/political denialism, etc
    Mass

  7. 7 mac
    November 9, 2009 at 7:48 pm

    OK, I’m confused. Are all those balls at the Bowling Alley actually seperate Universes ? If so, those bowling balls are as dense as the writer of this crap.

  8. 8 jaredcormier
    November 9, 2009 at 8:01 pm

    Bowling balls aren’t that dense unless they are made of material from the center of neutron stars


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